YOU LIKE SHOPPIN, DRINKIN AND SHAKIN THAT ASS - 30

It's been a slow Friday afternoon. I thought that I would go out tonight but then my plans had to change. I decided to do something that I haven't done in some time -- read the ads on CL. I couldn't resist this one because I like to shop and drink as much as the next girl. And ass shakin? Well, I have had many compliments on that.

Are you a Foxy Princess that likes shoppin' til you drop, cute guys that know how to dress, dancing until close, drinkin' and gettin' a little crazy, dancing with a great partner, maybe even letting body shots off your belly and love your boobs the way they are, like to socialize and likes a good kisser, being treated like a lady, giving or recieving back rubs after winding down from painting the town RED...Hit me up and I'll take care of everything else..;) Your pic gets mine, thanks ladies.

I must admit that I'm not too sure about the body shots though. It may depend on how many shots I've already had.

Can my wild intellectual property be tamed or at least tempered - 49

I love colossal egos!

I am polite, well mannered, and all that really goody goody stuff, but my mind is
constantly racing faster than most people can keep pace with. When I was at Brandeis, a prof gave a take home final to a lecture hall full of students. The
whole campus was buzzing about how Jerry Cohen's take home final asked a question that nobody could understand, therefore, nobody could answer. Except me. I got it figured out immediately. At another college, I got bored with professors just
rehashing the course textbook that they wrote, so I proceeding to disprove their
theoriees, tearing down their credability and their egs. The profs got even by
screwing with my grade but I did not care. My father is intellectually way high off the charts and I am carrying his genes. I like comedy such as Bullwinkle,
Bugs Bunny, the Three Stooges, the Marx Brothers, and Woody Allen. My brand of humour tends to be very dry, very intellectual. I can only go out with very smart women otherwise I would pull my hair out. Please respond only if you really meet my requirements, otherwise, I will unleash the wrath of 10,000 Maniacs.2

I hope this is a joke. Really, I do.

But just one nitpicky point - The Three Stooges - very intellectual humour? I guess pie-throwing is very difficult... And I guess being smart precludes the use of proper grammar and spelling. Okay, that was two nitpicky points..

5'6" nice good looking guy Looking for Mary Jane Girl same height - 30

Talk about not being able to spell..

Hi so Ive posted here pleanty of time met alot of intresting gals and had long conversations . But I still havent found the right woman to match with. I dont know what it is . I must be to picky . But Ill keep trying till I get it right because I know the right woman is out there for me. I like to do alot of activities. Mainly sox games I try to watch all games if not I hit the radio. I like body art like tattoo's Im personaly not into peircing not on me at least. But I do have a few tattoos. Im a brunette brown eyes 160 lbs athletic play some sports when I do :). I watch other sports like the Pats but Im mainly a baseball fan. Im a resident of boston I love boston I love the red sox / yankee rival . I enjoy dive bars, old school taverns ,live music ,Star wars 3 was great . I wair dickies and Im totaly into adidas wicked bad. I sometimes talk alot . And Im told I have an attitude but I am a libra if the signs mean anything to whoever. But Im cool. I work full time .I can cook my ass off and thats pretty much me . Im looking to connect with a woman with similar or same intrests I like long hair and nails . Basicly Im looking for a Victoria Gotti but with no children . I dont think children are bad at all. But if I want kids Ide rather have my own .. I would like to date a woman who is into herself and in shape but Im not sayin a bikini hard body but ya know what Im saying. Ok so if you would like to further get to know me .

Contact me it'll be fun and right finaly

I'm not sure English is even his first language. Whatever the reason for the pathetic stab at a proper use of the language, it's just.. who would even respond to this ad?

Let's get fucked up! - 35

I have been feeling guilty of late because I haven't been posting here like I used to. I came across this winner today and just had to post it. Let's face it. If I was still willing to answer ads from CL, I might have had to respond to this one. He is, after all, a man after my heart.

i want to take a girl out on the town and get fucked up and have a really good time. this is going to be a good weekend.
here is my photo so send yours.
take care.

OK. So maybe it doesn't really help him that (1) he doesn't seem to know what the shift key is used for and (2) I really didn't like his photo.

I suppose I have been reading the ads for too long now because none of them seem to hold my interest much. A friend has been trying to goad me into signing up with Match.com. (Of course this friend is attached and is just hoping to live vicariously.) Every now and then I think, "Maybe," because of course it could give me so much more new material to post.

Exceedingly preppy ladies prepare yourselves... - 26

I have to say, I really do like preppy (within reason). One of my favourite window displays was a J.Crew one a couple of years back - the tops of the mannequins were dressed appropriate, with shirt and tie, but the bottom half - only the boxers were there, the pants having been dropped to the ground. When passing by, my friend yelled out, "all the preppy guys I know do that!" It was funny. Anything, that non-sequiter aside..

Good afternoon, young women of the sweater-set. The Daft Preppy Gentlemen's Association of Woods Hole, in association with Living Like a Lord Industries, is now accepting candidates for introduction to our good time Memorial Day dust-up.

Traditionally, we have partaken in Herreshoff dingy races, wiffle ball on the lawn, taking of wine out-of-doors, and other leisure pursuits. Of course, waterview accomodations at a spacious old yankee ship captain's home will be provided.

Please, serious inquiries only. It would be excellent to see how you look in lilly pulitzer, cable knit, or nantucket red, so do feel free to send a picture. Mid-to-late nineties ISL pedigree preferred, but not necessary. Also, NESCAC more than Ivy, volvo more than saab, and more G & T than Cape Codder. Cheers and have a fine day.

Gosh, I've lived on the East coast too long, I actually understand everything in the ad (aside from ISL? Island single living? Icily salty laziness?) and find it appealing.

In Search of Second Girfriend ...........Not Secondary - 30

I can't really decipher this posting. I believe it's a thinly veiled request for a threesome, but like I said, I can't really make it out.

Hey I posted here b4 and I must say I had pleanty of responces . Some more intresting then the next lol. Welp Here I go again my gf and I have been 2gether for about 5-6 years. We have some what of a solid relationship. Were both happy and have fulltime jobs. Im in my 30's and she's a litlle older then I am not by much though. We are totaly differ from each other. In alot of ways. I basicly looking to hook my GF up with a buddy , Becuase all her friend are married with children.(loved that show) no longer call, and have moved away. She isnt bi. Allthough she sais shed have to be drunk as hell. Well me ,Im a the liquor store grabbing some type of whiskey or Rum . Im not gonna push for that though . We both are smokers and light drinkers. We live in Brighton. Have 3 cats. we are registered republicans .We just went to a baseball game on Wensday I was in Section 89 row kk seats 7 and 8 the girl that was in 8 or 9 Im sorry for stairing you would have been perfect for our establishment.. haha but it was an awsome game Variteck hit a walk off ,perfect way to end the game. So anyway seek single gal normol in shape that does Yoga my gf would want a partner for that and then you 2 can hang out work out together . Me Ill be watching baseball working and screaming like a normol bostonian calling everybody retahdz just kidding. I am wicked fun and funnier then most. My gf travels sometime so that would be good if you like traveling and taking airplane. Im not going to fly havent ever since I was 12. And there ya have it youll get to go all over due to her job. Ive been asked pleanty of times. Ok well time for me to go to work you ladies have a nice day. Remember all the good guys are already takin. But you have to wonder why some guys always stay single , things that make you go hmmmmmmmmmmm.

Yes, the entire post indeed makes me go hmmmmmmmmmmm.

Need a Woman to Teach me How to Suck Cock - 26

I know this is a thinly-veiled request for a blowjob, but really.

I am looking to meet a woman who can teach me how to suck a cock. I am really interested in learning how to do this as I have never done it before and I am a little leery of just approaching a random guy.

Maybe I can throw a wrench in it by saying that I'll instruct, and bring someone for him to practice on. Hee!